Hi. Yes
I love the view.
Hi.
Man
What did you do to him?
Yeah
Oh
What do you do here?
No. Which ones Kevin?  they glance over at Kevin subtly
Oh. Good for you guys.
Hello. Hello.   Hi.
What do you do?
Oh
Oh
Well that is a very safe place for them.
Oh...   Nice
Thats good.
No
Ooh
Um... Y-yeah. Okay.
Thanks.
Great.
Hey Kevin.
Do you need some help?
Well
Hmm. Well how much money do you have there?   Okay
Damn it!
Oh
Yoga.
Pass curvy metal piece
Ohh
Acting!
Lovitz.
Hello.
You too.
Yeah
No
Um
Here you go.
Oh
Oh that is so sweet.
Whats protocol on this?
Michael
Oh
No
Stop. You can let yourself be upset. Hes your friend. You know what I usually find?...
Oh
I think its really cool you hired Kevin.
That-Thats my car.
Michael
I just... Um
Cool! You drive your own car?
Yep. Just like you.
Bye. Kevin
Not bad.
Someday I would love to hear Beers in Heaven.
Is he okay?
Yeah well
Hey there.
So you missed something really big.
Yeah
So... You know
Okay.
Oh that would be great.
I love pie.
Okay.
Okay. Good night.
Yeah
Oh
Oh
Oh
Oh
Great.
Ex-squeeze me.
Almost
Math is hard.
And arch your back. And slowly bring up your head.
Oh
Actually
Im not a lesbian. I dont know why I said that... Its a joke.
There is no joke. I just said it because I havent had much luck lately and Im not really looking to date. Maybe I should switch to women.
Um
I knew that. OK
Oh
Wikka wikka wikka what?
Youre shaking. Are you all right?
Hey
Oh
So
No! You do not talk to him like that!
He is not an idiot!
He is mentally challenged. But hes doing a super job here.
Well
Im sorry.
I have a crazy idea. What if we did
Obesity-caused illnesses.
Thats so lame they didnt invite us.
Hey
Itll probably be a total disaster
Really?
Oh
Its kind of a good news
Ok
Eight point five. I got a red wine stain on my favorite shirt. But hes cute
Whats wrong?
Dietings only half of it.
And exercise. Although I know everybody loves going to the gym.
...or that Dunder Mifflin does not discriminate. Nor does it condone unhealthy dieting habits or extreme weight loss strategies. As was clearly stated in the official starting---
What are you doing?
Oh
I just got off... Kendall? I just got off...
Oh
No.
And you know what? I even got two tickets to see the Counting Crows tonight as a surprise. Why do guys not call when they say they are gonna call?
Thanks. Thats sweet. Anyways
Well
So were only eight pounds behind Utica. Now
Im calling it. I guess thats curtains for the yoga guy.
Yeah.
Yeah?
Aww man
Look at where my seats were.
Yeah.
Michael
Ok.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Pencils down!   Just kidding
Today is ethics day. After they finish their quiz Im going to run my first ethics meeting here. Its gonna be insaaaaane. No
Thanks Michael.   Today were going to have a business ethics seminar because recently
Lets start discussing those questionnaires that you filled in this morning. It is wrong to make personal calls during work hours. Now
Corporate would like to emphasize that ideally you would all totally agree with that statement.
Thank you. In fact
Yes
Stealing office supplies is another big ethical area that there seems to be some confusion about.
Well
I am?
Ok.   Michael makes a really good point so
No
Ok
What was the dilemma?
Oh--- no no no.
No--- I
Meredith
Michael
I mean all of you have done things I wouldnt have done myself but Merediths actions are really over the line.
So
No
What I dont understand is... why the steak coupons? I mean
Well unfortunately immunity or something being off the record does not really exist in the workplace. I mean Ive never heard of anyone whos kept their job after something like this.
Its Mike-raculous.
Sounds good.
Oh I already bought this...
So
Oh
Mmm.
In Summer.
Maybe we should talk about Meredith first.
Ok
Im from da future.
Well
We punish her?
I dont think we could enforce that.
A chastity belt.
No
What am I saying?
Im saying that her behavior is unethical and a little icky and I dont think I want to work in an environment where that sort of conduct is tolerated.
Its not a family. Its a workplace.
Its been a little tense. People are suspicious of me. And my best friend in the office wont even talk to me. Turns out being the morality police does not make you popular. I should know because in middle school I was the hall monitor and the kids used to stuff egg salad in my locker. I was just hoping middle school was over.
Can I sit?
Yes
Oh
Umm
No
No. I can do it.
Can I have everyones attention? Excuse me
Everyone
In this next section we examine the difference between sick days and personal days. Sick days are only to be used when an illness precludes you form doing your job or can spread to your coworkers. Personal days
Ahoy.
Good.
Of course. Yeah.
You OK? You seem kind of...
I can imagine.
Oh
Waaa! More paper! Waaa!   No
Shes with Angela.
You still gonna be mean to me?
Yes.
Hello.
Yeah
Oh
Yeah.
Yeah.
It would help.
No
Um
I dont care
Oh
Im going out with you.
No more.
No more.
Thank you
Oh
We could go to the food court and get different foods. You could get Chicken Teriyaki. I could get a hot dog.
...Hell yeah.
Yeah
Its time to go.
Youre crazy
Oh
Yeah
Oh
I didnt forget my keys
Oh
Can I talk to you for a second?
That wasnt us
Michael I think this is our fault.
Oh...
Hows everyone doing? My door is always open if anyone wants to talk.
Michael scored the big ticket item. Springsteen tickets! The boss scored the boss.
He knows how to get things. He got me.
Sorry.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
The Springsteen tickets seemed too good to be true. But
Oh
Michael is taking a personal day to move me up.
Breaker one-nine
Kidding.
Its been a weird week since we found out I had to transfer. Michael wanted me to quit and get some job here in Scranton
I have to unpack this weekend but maybe next weekend we go to the outlets!
Yeah it did look shorter on the map-
You were sleeping? You were talking before.
Were only halfway?
Lets check there.
No.
No.
No
Its not gonna work.
Theres too much distance.
Michael weve only been dating each other for a few weeks
And I like you too.
Ive dated four guys last year too.
Oh.
Michael. Dont. Dont. Dont make it harder than it has to be.
If you leave on Friday
And then sleep in Saturday. That only leaves us less than 24 hours before you have to go back again.
Oh.
Well-
How long could we keep that up?
Years?
Years? Of just a few hours every weekend?
Thank you.
I do
Youll be okay
You will.
Okay. Bye.
Oh no
All right.
Hi. You remember AJ
Lemonade sounds great.
Um
I remember your chair pants idea.
Okay
Yep
Have ya hoyd the news? Extry! Extry! Read all about it!
Ooh
Do you have a script for the sketch
Crystal cool.
We could do Back to the Future.
We have to convince Dunder and Mifflin to go back in time... fix their parents.
Jaws. They swim in the ocean and they terrorize the whole community.
Dun-der. Dun-der...
Oh... We havent found our great idea yet.
Oh.
Hmm...
Are you ready to play SlumDunder Mifflinaire?
For one hundred dollars
That is correct!  both run to another side of the stage
Nice campus. Think youll get in?
Im Robert Dunder.
Robert Mifflin had a great life. But unfortunately
That is correct!
The economic downturn has been difficult recently
That is correct!
pantomimes biting off Michaels fingers
They didnt know?
Hindsight.
How do you think it went before the Buffalo thing?
There werent any laughs.
Yeah
Well
I cant wait.
Whatd you think?
Okay. So good to see you.
This is Holly.
No this is Holly.
No
I am calling because
A lot of people.
Three nuns
Yeah.
I dont think wed have kids.
It was just for a few weeks!
Michael
You romanticize things.
Michael
You made ourselves to be more than we were.
I dont know what youre getting so upset about
Michael...
This is Holly Flax
Hi.
Is there any way I can get a hand with these
Well
Well I did show my face around these parts
I most certainly am.
Unnnnnnngh!
Oh
Oh
Hi.
Oh
Would you put those out?
Oh
Oh
Watch out for my guns theyre both loaded.
Its a pea shoot...
Yeah
Oh...
AJ gave me that.
Mmhmm.
Why?
That is a really good point. AJ said he hadnt seen any of the Toy Story movies.
No. I know. I was like
Get a life!
We sat down and we watched them all in one day.
Now hes the biggest Toy Story fanatic ever.
Next day I found him in my bed.
We live together.
He had a little note pinned to him that said
Yeah. I love him.
Oh
Oh
Okay
Yeah.
You guys
Dwights right. What you did was dangerous and inappropriate. Im really surprised at you guys. Last time I was here
I didnt know you had a girlfriend.
Who did this? Its obvious to me Im not welcome here
You think this is funny?
Michael
You made up a fake girlfriend to see if Id get jealous? And you destroyed a gift my boyfriend gave me? What is the matter with you?
Michael
You guys
What? AJ!
What are you doing here? Oh
Wow! Nice.
Oh... when did you get here?
Oh
Hey
Oh
It was blue cheese dressing.
Theyre warm.
Oh
Ha ha
Yeah.
I got it for Christmas. Im so out of my league here.
Holly misses old phone.
New phone is confusing. Gets bad reception.
Bummer.
Reeses Pieces?
Oh
Oh
Oh
Nothing really happened. I mean
It just wasnt fair of me to give him an ultimatum in the first place. The whole thing is totally my fault. But were going to be just fine. Just fine.
Yes
Whats up?
Oh
Were gonna be just fine. You know how you say something over and over and the words start to sound weird? Going to be just fine... just fine... just fine... just fine...
I just think we need to cool things down for awhile. Yeah
Oh
Is Mikanos greek? He sounds Italian.
Maybe Mikanos ran away to join the Italian circus.
What do you do in your free time?
Mmm. Do you like movies?
We have to try this out on somebody.
Its a very strong coffee with milk from a goat.
No more brain damage.
Ahh!
I dont know.
Wonderful seminar!
Michael
For what?
Dont you have a sales call to go on?
We dont know that.
Why is it such a certainty that we are supposed to be together?
Michael
Well you dont have to agree.
No you dont.
No
Its the gas station on Benet Street?
Ok.
Oh no no no. Ill be fine.
Which way did he go?
Oh really? You dont think he walked by the bakery just for the smell of it?
Oh.
Hey.
Oh
What?
Are their egg rolls really that big?
What? No. Dwight asked if I wanted an egg roll. What... what are you implying?
I have no idea.
I dont know.
Will you stop! There has been a few coincidences
Stop looking at me like that. Okay
Look
Michael?
What are you doing up here?
Dunder Mifflin.
I missed you too.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Okay
Bye.
Okay
Ohh. Can you get lower?
A little lower.
I cannot keep myself from Michael. Everything he does is sexy. He has this undeniable animal magnetism. Hes a jungle cat. The man exudes s*x. He can put both his legs behind his head.
So we kiss occasionally.
Sorry to interrupt. Forgot to collect my things.
Oh
Yeah
Okay.
Two people in love?
Wait
Wow
I love you.
Hello.
No
No touching.
Oh.
Almost got you.
Youre not touching me.
And here.
Okay.
You said you would.
No
Yes. Number three.
Give me all your money and take off your clothes.
Come one. Nobodys looking. Whats wrong?
Maybe we didnt want to think about it. We can make it work. Well date long-distance.
We werent in love last time.
Im not saying it wont be hard. But we can make it work. Thats what she said.
Hi.
What? What are you talking about?
No
What if I said it wasnt up to them?
The company. Nobody knows our future
You do?

You never told me you made a movie.
Its got you.
I cant wait.
Uh... which part?
Hey! Good movie.
I loved it.
Uhm
Uhm...
Not worried about that.
Wha- Its your dream and you never even mentioned it before!
Well why do you have to make a movie at all?
Really
Im real.
I love you too.
Hey
Hi!
You must be Todd.
Very funny. Okay lets get started.
All right.
I already have.
Michael loves you
Yes I did
Yeah.
Oh
Hey
Uhm.
Michaels recommendation was glowing! And
Okay
Do any of you have any concrete complaints about something hes done?
Well if thats the case
So
Well
So much happening.
No! No.
Did Todd tell you to do that?
I love you.
Thats certainly opinionated.
Oh Im going.
I dont think hes funnier than me.
No
No
Ok : Bill Cosby
Honey
Im sorry about your friend.
You ahh.
What ah you wicked smaht?
Who ahh?
10 dollars.
20.
You know we dont have to sell that if you dont want to. If its a problem with the neon I can have my neon guy take a look.
Well we could put it in storage... in case.
You know... in case if something changes.
Nope.
Michael called Dad?
Um
Hi Dad.
Um
I... Im not there Dad
I live here. Um
No. No... no Dad.
Mom
Well who do you have?
No. Mom?
This is your moms old stuff?
Hows she doing?
How do you know when its time?
Let me see.
Look I need to talk to you.
I think I need to go home to Colorado. My dad isnt doing so well.
I dont know.
Yeah.
Yeah
And I want you to come with me. Now I know thats a lot to ask of a boyfriend..
And I was thinking... you know maybe since given our last conversation that were both ready... Michael Scott will you..
Uh
13 dollars.
Listen about earlier ...
It was wrong to put you in that position and... Michael you are my life now. Im not going to Colorado.
Why?
I remember.
Michael..
Yes.
Mh hmm.
Oh
What happened here?
Nice
Hi guys.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
Your wife becoming me will I.  everyone in the kitchen starts cheering
Hello there!
Boulder. Is something wrong? Are you okay?
Oh you mean this?
Ill pay the rent!   Okay
Well Ill see you tonight. Ill pick you up outside baggage claim.
I love you too.
