Hey
Im sorry.
I love their sandwiches.
Really? Today?
Oh
Yeah
Hi
Hey
Yeah
Eighty-nine.
Yeah.
A girl.

Michael?
Um... I need to talk to you in your office. Itll just take two seconds.
The full story is that Randall resigned because of sexual harassment. So Corporate asked me to do a five minute review of the Company Sexual Harassment policy.
Its really not a big deal
And then Corporate is going to send in a lawyer...
Just to refresh you... .
on our policy.
Maybe not some of them. Maybe not inappropriate ones.
Yeah
So remember
Great point.
Um... in fact
Uh
I can go over it with you.
Its over.
Office relationships are never a good idea. Yeah. So lets just try to avoid them. But
Ok
No.
Well
Okay
Hey Dwight.
Sure.
Technically
Yeah
I should get back to work.
He talked the whole time.
Um
You dont need to write ex.
Michael...
Any word on those time cards?
We want to go home.
That is unbelievable.
Arent the suggestions meant for you?
I got Angela. She is into these posters of babies dressed as adults. I got her one of those. I felt kind of weird buying that.
Well
Were really not supposed to serve alcohol.
Wow
What
What do you need?
I dont think Pams gonna want to come into the mens room.
Ryan
Dead.
No. Cant
You just got your corporate credit card back. Do you really want me to take it away again?
Im not processing this.
He seems fine to me.
Thats no burst pipe.
Been to Amsterdam.
To Amsterdam.
Umm... After my divorce. Yeah.
Uh
Come on.
Okay
Alright
I think these belong to you.
Believe me
Is everything okay?
Uh... its true...
Mmhmm.
Well
Not Jan.
If you really want to have kids
Somehow.
Yes.
Didnt you lose a lot of money on that other investment
Who brought in donuts?
Happy birthday!
I... guess I forgot.
Are you serious?
Honestly
I dont really think people are in the laughing mood.
I work here.
Oh
Hookah is not an illegal drug
No its not. Its a type of pipe. You can fill it with tobacco
You cant do that.
Thats not random.
Just letting Oscar vent a little. We would use the break room
Its just a little dispute over a poster in their workspace.
Michael
Heres how I usually handle this: all I do is listen.
These things just have a way of working themselves out.
Its like if you write someone a letter
Okay.
That was the right decision for me and my marriage.
You solved it?
Well
Mmm-Hm.
I... I cant do that.
That...
Its all Dwights.
Every Friday at 4
Actually
Yeah
To your HR representative.
Fine
Sure.
Just take it.  flashes goes off
Talk to Michael. I gave him the box.
Actually
Ill call.
I have good cards.
I dont really play cards
OK I think Oscar would just like if you used lame or something like that.
No not really...
Apparently you called Oscar faggie for liking the movie Shakespeare in Love more than an action movie.
All right Michael
I mean for real.
No
OK
OK
All right
What?
Really? Shes dating?
Hey
Its
Um
Okay.
Michael
What?
It was obvious...
Second?
Actually
Yes.
Michael
Jan told me just a few minutes before she told you.
Well for a minute there
Hey.
Ah
About seven.
Well
Hey
Hey
Oh
How are you? Hey. Welcome back.
No
No
So... okay.
All right... sorry... sorry about that.
It was just...
Nothing.
Um... You might want these orientation materials.
I dont... I dont think we can do that.
This is Toby. Hey Pam. Where are you calling from?
Michael. Whys everyone locked in the conference room?
Well
You know theyre teasing you. I mean... obviously
Oh
Dwight
Come on Dwight. We went over this
Its a dead animal in an office. You cant...
Im sorry.
Clean it in your car.
Hey Dwight. Pretty nice robe-   Why?
Hey Kev.
Hey I need to talk to you right now.
About you and Jan.
Wish it were true
Michael
You know
All right
All right
At the gym.
Toby! Yeah!
The simple solution would be to open a window... if we had... windows that could open.
Oh
Well
Here.
I was...
Yes.
Im... here
Well
Yeah
Which is where?
Thanks Dwight.
Can you stop...
Theres a bunch of people back here
Guys...
I dont think Michael intended to punish me
Where?
Alright.
No.
How would we get home?
Hi
Just preparing for the deposition.
This may be the first time that a male subordinate has attempted to get a modest scheduled raise by threatening to withhold s*x from a female superior. It will be a groundbreaking case when it inevitably goes to trial.
Sure.
Ok
Um
No
Well
You know
Sedentary.
Creed is eating an apple. I found a potato.
Nice.
Hey
Whats going on?
I dont think laughing about it is an appropriate response.
I dont think the women in this office -
I was at a parent-teacher conference.
Hey
I-I think we hang out an appropriate amount of time.
Anybody need sun block? Got SPF 30.
Its Beach Day...
Hey
Uh-huh.
No
Yeah.
Oh
Alright
Hey!
Im makin great time. Usually I have to take a bathroom break half way through a race like this
And the winner is Toby Flenderson.
Where are we?
He couldnt have made it a circle?
Ohh.
Yes
...about some other people engaging in PDA and
Ok
Alright everyone
Yes.
Hey...   you two.
Oh well
Uh huh.
Lets just wait and see what happens.   You know?
Lets just wait.
Technically
Hey guys. This is my
This is everybody else... okay... This is the place... so thanks for the lift.
Absolutely.  Toby kisses Amy for an extended period of time
I just really like you.
Have a great day!
I wouldnt want to do that now would I?
It was Ryan wanted Michael
To whomever
I know right? I just want to go
Alright
Fun?
Really?
What was fun about it for you? Was it the death of the twins?
Did you even read it?
Who was the main character?
I really didnt think I was going to have a good time
Oh
Michael.
Under the stars. It was really beautiful
Me
Ryan invited me to go on his wilderness adventure retreat. It was this amazing
Michael wasnt invited.
Hey Jim.
Hey
Yeah...
My birthday was two months ago.
There was no party.
Well
I dont know
I just though you could add me. I dont see the harm in that.
Im allergic to mushrooms.
Michael
Um
...You know
Excuse me.
I might have it in here.
Its so random that I have it.
When I put it in I thought it would be a waste of time
No.
Sorry guys
Hey
Course you do.
More like Everyone lets get your boss laid Saturday.    Toby puts his hand on Pams knee
Can I talk to you a second?
Uh
Well
Yeah.
He didnt seem like he was joking.
Alright... Well
Um
You know
Id say all the goofing around at Pams desk
Well
Morning.
Good morning
Fine. Good.
As part of my last day Im training the new Human Resources rep in the ways of the company. Again
So this is H.R. This is your desk.
Yeah
Hey
I want to introduce you to...
Hey Michael.
Id like to introduce you to my replacement.
Come on.
Michael Scott
Nothing.
Youre-youre not in it.
I love it. I love it... I would love a picture of the two of us
No
Im gonna... Ill go get one. Stay.
Whatd you guys do?
Well
Wow
Hi Pam. Stay.
Im Toby.
This place
Ive got some ideas
Well let me see... I would
I guess everythings okay.
I made it this far
Suck on this.
Thanks
I normally do nothing
Hey. Hey
Yeah
This one right here.
Its digital
Thanks...   Really
Its not.
Oh
Hey.
Well
The lady cop acted like shed never pulled someone over for driving too slow. And I tried to get out of it with the famous Toby Flenderson 10
Damn it.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I remember.
Thanks Kelly.
Colorblind.
Its out of context. Its not the same as driving.
Well
I spent three years in advertising before I came here.
Hes gonna ruin everything.
I like it just us three.   I dont want it to change.
I love The Finer Things Club. My ex-wife used to have a book club
Forcing your employees to set you up is not a
Well
But now its being looked at as more of a productivity issue.
I know
This is Jim Halpert...
And Pam Beesly.
Youre welcome.
This is a picture Ive been carrying around in my wallet for about six years. Its this unspoiled beach in Costa Rica
Hey.
Hey.
Yeah
Yeah. Um
Think you could... wants to hand the camera to Jim
Uh
Okay
Well
Im gonna really miss going to beers with you guys every Tuesday night  Pam holds up soda in salute
...building looked into...
in a hospital bed
Hi
Well thanks Michael.
Well thats sweet
Well
...and
It was actually kind of hard to meet people I found.
And uh
Are you all right
Hey guys thats really inappropriate.
Im not going to punch you
No
Hey
Why?
Hey
Hey
Dont search my stuff.
I have a reasonable right to privacy.
Michael!
Oh my God!
That was... I went to Costa Rica for a few months. What is going on?
That is not mine. I have never seen that before.
What is going on here?
Of course not!
I didnt put caprese salad in my drawer
Did you?
You know but the police could have been out there you know
I did leave.
Well
What?
We should really have the offices air quality tested. We have radon coming from below
Youll see.
Michael
Michael
Okay you know
Sure. Wow.   Ow...
Hey Sasha
No
This is great. My ex-wifes going to be so pissed.   For once daddys gonna be a hero.
Hey
Oh
I was-- I was gonna get the doll.
But I-- I promised my daughter. Darryl
I only have $200.
Oh man
Oh thanks. Shes gonna...   oh...
No. Its even-- its even better than the one I wanted.
Michael is like a movie on a plane. You know
Not much? Whats up with you?   Nah its okay. Im in the bathroom. Hey you been watching Damages this year? Its so good. No
I have like
You have to stop.
Cant you just not look at his feet?
Well
I could loan you a pair of socks.
No
Hey
Your outfit.
You--you might consider pulling it down a touch. Its ri--its riding up a little high.
All right
All right
Im running this meeting.
Its not. Its not. Sit down or I am writing you up.
Casual Fridays are cancelled.   Lets just not do it anymore.
Theres not a single appropriate outfit in this whole--except mine
Ah
Really
What are you guys talking about? I have a daughter. How can I be a virgin?
And thats how you broke your ankle?
I will send this off to corporate. Make sure you hold on to your medical bills. Feel better.
He has a doctors note.
A guy on my street fell off a ladder painting his house. It was on the news.
Thats not a very good Darryl.
Hmmm.
Well
Sounds like a EMDP-40.
Youre into trains?
Wow.
Thats so cool.
Wow
Well
Uhh
Get over there! Get over there!
I cant believe this.   Hey you
You gonna eat all that dog food yourself?
Just keep going.
If they were dilated...
No
Hey Darryl
What?
Well
You really did it...
Ahhh
So Dwight and Darryl came to an agreement that both would file complaints with corporate and now I get to do all this paperwork. We worked it out.
Michael
What?

Well I guess this weddings not going to happen. I wonder if this is it for them.
Well the fun is in it.
Yeah
Oscar says I checked out huh? Huh.
Hey
Oh
What did I do?
Yeah
Um
Yeah
Ah
Ok
Yeah... thats why they pay me the big bucks.
Im good...
You know
Hey Pam
Well
Maybe you could just take the rest of the day off... you know...
Buddy
Pam
I heard about the hit. Just-- make sure its off company property
Okay
Okay. And-- the-the power-- comes from the back foot. So its-- its all one motion through the-- body. So you stay a little low and theres a twist. You keep your shoulder down and you kind of throw out the arm.   Pow!
Yes.
Yes.
Okay.
Wow Michael
You cant
No!
Wow! Cause...
Thank you!
Thanks man!  awkwardly tries to hug Ryan
What are
Come on
Sorry. Hey
What do you mean?
Um... nothing comes to mind.
Mm-hmm.
Happys a funny word.
You know
Yes.
Generally happy.
Oh
I dont know.
I dont know. No.
I dont know how Im going to get through this. I dont want to lie and I DONT want to tell the truth.
Well
Its
Look
Michael
Oop.
Looks like we kicked it.
Oh
If we dont patronise the only Syrian restaurant in town
Does it have to be pizza? Could go for a
I dont think this fax is going through. Is there a different... I can just put it through again
I called Tallahassee. He can ask you not to come in
Yeah
This here is a radon test kit.   Okay I will be putting em everywhere. And... please dont throw these out.   This is a radon test kit.   Please dont throw these out.   See them all over the office.
Come on
Please sit down.
I dont wanna do this.
Hey everyone.
Well
Good.
Oh
Oh
Oh... yes.
Write your own damn novel.
Im hungry.
Well
Guys
Yeah
Whats something that you...
Michael has been assigned six hours of mandatory counseling with a trained professional. I actually have a degree in social work. I mean
We can do this with more privacy.
Id like you to imagine a place where you feel very peaceful. For me
Uh... what was your favorite flavor of...
What?
Ok
Michael
Tell me!
I think we might be about to maybe really get somewhere.
Of course.
Come on Michael. Those are all fake stories.
Oh.
You know what Michael? Youre right. You win. This is pointless. Were not getting anywhere. I got a bunch of fun stuff
We can play something more complicated if you like.
So you have played it before?
Whos Jeff?
So
Did you guys do much stuff together?
Its working. Im doing it!
Its really sad that your dog ran away. Why did it keep you from going to the park?
Why?
Dogs dont do that.
I dont know.
Its very important for you to be liked
Im just trying to help you Michael.
I just want to...
Just fill them out any way you want.
Ill have Erin fax them back to corporate.
Yes.
He seems fine.
Heh.
You filled them in and faxed them yourself!
You remember that.
Unless part of you made that mistake on purpose.
Its a great stick
Thanks!
No.
Oh.
Sunday church service... its been a few years. The Big Guy and I
Okay
standing in the church sanctuary
Hi guys.
Uh
Uh
Okay
Well
Yes.
I dont know.
Come on.
Guys
I can neither confirm nor deny this. Lets just say Ill be up to my neck in jury duty.
Corporate will be sending someone else to take my place for a while.
Uh
Yeah
Yeah.
Hey.
Uh
I cant talk about it or Ill get removed from the jury.
I know people are only this excited to talk to me because of the trial. But
Oh
Theres this female uh
Who looks exactly like you.
Yeah. No
What?
No
No
In meetings.
I really disagree with this. I think its kind of hateful. Though I am a little happy right now to have a platform to talk about the outcome of a case I was recently a juror on. The Scranton Strangler. That mans being put to death. I was part of the verdict
Well you know Michael
Okay.
Heres the thing Rory
Do- Well you should give him a little time to settle in. But-
Well
Thanks.
Hey
Oh
I am supposed to collect eyewitness accounts. Who saw Dwight do this?
Would you consider this a terrorist incident?
Oh
Uh
Im sorry
W-What?
How will your experience selling refinery equipment translate to our smaller scale here?
Uh... Human Resources.
Yes.
So
Well
Well
Im sorry
I didnt think you were.
But there arent...
Well
No
I should not be here. Im in the- I was in the wrong- Im- Im sorry. Uh
I would spend a lot of time launching my true crime podcast
Hey
Uh
Its probably okay...
I think its better that I...
Its a finicky car...
Its a little tricky
Every Halloween I tell him the same thing - You cant bring weapons into the office
If you turn out the lights well do a little dance.
Great.
So great.
Oh
...bones. What?
What... you cant... Gabe? Are you...
For you?
Who are you seeing? Thats gr...
Oh.
You know I dont have to do the paperwork unless youre actually dating.
But I mean...uh have you talked to her? Is sh...
Do you know her last name
Shes going to be screaming her own last name?
Good luck Gabe.
Its going to be nice to have just a healthy
Radiant.
You know its not just pregnant women who dont get their due. You know whos gorgeous? Helen Mirren.
You know what would be the hottest thing ever? Its a pregnant Helen Mirren.
Did you bring your passport with you?
Well
No.
Oh my god.
You know this sounds a lot like the premise of my latest Chad Flendermen novel. A murder for framing.
Chad Flendermen. Just an easy going black guy
No
Fingerprints can be planted. You know with a severed hand...
.....Chad Flendermens kryptonite.
Well
Note? Its a symphony.
I would love that.
Toby
Bears.
To madness.
And I am Bacchuss friend!
You know
You mean food truck. Ernestos was a food truck.
Ernesto!
Yeah
Its the empanada guy.
It has been a long
It is real
Me?
Yeah
Self-defense is not some fun boxing match
That may have been my fault.
Okay
I dont think thats very common.
Well
Its interesting that youre drawn to the point of view of the attacker.  You would like the turn of the table. Okay
All right
Now
Theres no shame in getting beaten up by a girl. My ex-wife used to demolish me.
Okay
Okay. Good point...
I dont... I dont...
I dont know if this is gonna help...Uh...
We should stay to maybe some more traditional models...
Okay
Okay
Knock
What?
You cant claim territories. This is the only place I interact with people. Cant you sell at your church or barber shop?   Or chess club
Thats it? Yeah
Hey
No
See?
No
You know
Im
No.
50?
And this is Sam.
Yeah
Dont make me be your pony
Yeah. I have my dignity too. I refuse to be another mans horsey.
Robert did say youd be joining us. Welcome. Im Tony.
I- I said Im Tony. Okay I made a mistake. I thought it might go unnoticed. But uh
It happens
Erin
Me?
Now
I like to think Lloyd Gross is a no-nonsense guy who doesnt back down from anybody. And he calls people Kimosabe.
Thats true. Theres no rule. You can check the employee handbook. Oh
No.
Ive seen guys like you. Big guys who like to push the little guys around. Lloyd Gross eats bullies like you for breakfast.
Hey
Andy
I can refer you to someone to talk to.
Give you a name or-
Hey
Do you see David Wallace in the room right now?
Kelly Kapoor is gone. Her fiancé Ravi was hired as a pediatrics professor at Miami university.
Miami University in Ohio. On her last day
Shortly after Kelly left
Theres two new guys back there with me now. Theyre in their 20s. And we really get along.
Just three single guys. Getting into trouble.
Hey you wanted to see me?
You can only fire Nellie for cause.
Except you just told me you were gonna make it up. Now if she sues
Cant. I took a course at the Weintraub Memory Academy. I sat next to this woman named Beverly Brook. She had a Greek salad for lunch. See what I mean?
This is a bloodbath. Alright
It is enough of this. Everyone
I w-
John Stamos.
Johnny Depp.
Sh
Uh-huh.
Its an EMF hotspot.
You think I have a machine for measuring bee hives?
Hey.
Are... are you me?
Oh my goodness

Look at.. Look at me.
Yeah.
Kevin. His gambling problem mustve resurfaced. Im gonna have to send him home until I can do an investigation.
Hi
How?
So you set him up.
I knew it. I knew it from the beginning it was possible.
A few years ago
I always thought he might have been set up but I felt pressured to convict.
Tough? I put an innocent man on death row.
I have very fertile hair glands.
I am so glad I got all of the dudes to do Movember. We have the dopest time back in the annex.
We even go to lunch
Smile if you love mens prostates.
This is fun. You know? I mean
That is-- that is a loaded question.
He said that?
I-- I dont know if theres truth to-- to
Oh... uh...
I dont...
They dont have vaginas.
No. Theyre just regular men.
Uh... wow....
You know whos not gonna get to work on some exciting new startup this year? George Howard Skub
The Scranton strangler. George Howard Skub. Havent I told you about the jury I was on a couple years ago?
I--I could--I could talk about it.
I could
Heres the thing about moonlight. Its not sunlight.
Yeah. So anyway
Two dimes
What? I was just explaining--
Why wouldnt it--
But why?
Are you gonna kiss me?
Hey
So proud of you
Im just curious though
Petes a pretty cool guy
Yeah
Mm-hmm.
Lady...you never stop surprising me.
Warehouse Worker Frank remains silent
Uh... it... compliment...
There were two or three sorrys in there.
You cant fire Pete. You understand why
Oh
Alright
Its just boiler plating
I already signed it. I was just showing you.
Andy
Hey Nellie. Mmm. I am so sick of February. Its the shortest month but it sure doesnt feel that way. We should catch up.
Yknow Ive been going over my notes from the trial...
...feel like I may have glossed over a few...
...minor points.
Ive been drafting a letter.
Im going to the prison. This afternoon. Im gonna talk to the strangler.
Well I just wanted to say Im doing it.
Hi
This is the prison. Uh
He- he cant do that. Turns out shes allowed to have feelings of sexual arousal. It doesnt become a violation until she physically acts on it.
A little ironic that Im going to be kind of a TV star
Oh
Lets do it. Lets get personal.
Whoa.
Oh
chuckles
Oh
Oh
Yes
Youre really there to talk to each other. I would say that the therapist is more of a facilitator.
He might start by asking each of you
Well
I mean
Blah blah blah blah. Jim.
They do. That they do.
That they do.
Good morning.
Hey I left my glasses down here somewhere. Crossing through
Ow! Ow!
Im sorry!
Andy?
You wanted to see the gooey eye.
Alright
Okay
Andy
Yeah
I cant.
Oh
No
No
Yeah. Yeah
Hello!   Hello!
Hi!
Oh.
Oh
Anyone can follow a Twitter feed. Wanna share a cab?
alone in cab} After Dwight fired me
Yes.

Its everything.
Good luck.
Oh
Yeah. Ill stop by.
